2 inches away from Death

 ..and it was not fun.

It was just not my time.

But something made sure I realize that.

For some reason I cross the road looking towards one direction, ignoring the other - which usually almost never happens, music in my ears, thoughts in my head, and WHOOSH! a Truck goes by really fast, its wind brushes my face 2-3 inches away from me.

And I just keep walking as if nothing happened.

In bed at night, it all comes to me. Lying there sleepless staring at the ceiling for hours, not sure what to think.

Till now I'm not sure what to think.

Is it just not my time to go yet?

No matter how much you might feel in control, there are moments that humble you in life, a slap of reality, reducing you to who you really are: a mere creature of many, a biological life form that is able to ask questions and pass on knowledge. A creature that is capable while extremely incapable. The oxymoron of human existence has filled books throughout the brief recorded history, without any concrete answers to the question why.

Life is really so fragile. People make too many sacrifices for things that they think will last, they spend every living breath trying to gain possessions that are just matter, not thinking that the matter we're living in is disposable, and can just go any second.

I felt the breath of death down my neck, and I'm not afraid. If you want to take me now go ahead, just don't leave my family without protection.

I feel like I'm dreaming, appreciative of every day I'm still alive, but still traumatized, shaking, and want just to go cry in my mother's lap.

Apprehensive, yet assured that everything will eventually turn out to be ok.

What an interesting year this is gonna be.

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