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Showing posts from September, 2006

Anything to declare?

Definately not!! Or is there? I just don't know. At times I get tired of all the thinking going on inside my head. I get tired of living two seperate lives, one in the physical sense and a totally different life inside my head, a life where there people are slightly different from how they really are, a life where just very small changes are made to alot of things around, and Bob's your uncle, here you have a life you've been dreaming to have.. But is it healthy to keep on day-dreaming that way? No way! Yeah things happen alot to distract you, or to keep your head under the water of fantasy, but things have to change.. I don't know if suffering this has brought me anywhere, but this is what I have to change.. to stop thinking about what I want for a while, and concentrate on what I have. For the time being, I am simply clueless on how to walk down that road. I have noone to blame but myself, absolutely noone. Dear God! What is it that I am waiting for? What is it that I

Spiritual Reluctance

For a while now, the endless debate between a person and his belief in what is good and what is right has been ongoing through my chest.. and believe it or not, it is a blessing from God when the struggle is so fierce, and at the same time things do not end up the way your intuition has always told you, not the way you have expected, simply because later on in life you will not always recieve what you expect, and you will have to take it champ.. But all of a sudden, things start to clear up, and also all of a sudden, everything makes sense, and nothing makes much difference. What is a person trying to do? Oppose the will of God? or maybe tell God that I know better that He knows? Why is it that a human cannot surrender to the will of his creator? It is the shortest way to piece of mind, even if what is taking place in your life is not totally what you have wished for, you KNOW for sure that there is a plan for you, and what you expect from God is what you get! Don't you trust his p